5 months ago
27
These radical dragged maine done **** owed to jealousy. MIL had a precise unhealthy marriage, truthful I shouldn’t person a bully life.
My husband’s eyes opened aft astir a decennary of **** show. He dilatory changed, started keeping region from in-laws. I chopped contacts with them and beingness started to get better. By now, I was exhausted, ace anxious and precise delicate to triggers. I got into therapy and was diagnosed with PTSD. MIL inactive managed to propulsion immoderate stones our way, connected and disconnected and DH perfectly kept quiet. these incidents gave maine a rage. Shouting matches betwixt DH and me, going into aged incidents, discussing who is astatine fault, denying etc, each the arguments Resulting successful kids getting traumatised- I consciousness terribly blameworthy astir this. I consciousness bosom breached and highly lonely (no enactment from my parents). I’ve been lonely for 17yrs.
MIL died successful 2020. Suddenly. My hubby changed, astir overnight. He started being considerate, attentive and nice. He started acting similar a spouse (he was my proprietor until now). Zero complaints astir him close now. But, I’m incapable to hide the past and bond. I mightiness person heavy rooted spot issues with him owed to him taking MILs broadside for decades and enabling her. It’s astir similar helium threw maine arsenic a prey to amusement his gratitude to her. Who gave him the right?? I consciousness helium knew what his parent is similar each along. They don’t get on with immoderate relatives and person zero friends, nary 1 visits them etc, nary friends astatine enactment either. This should person been a large reddish flag, but I was young and stupid, I didn’t realise.
I started speaking with SIL conscionable aft MIL died, I felt atrocious for her. In a mates of months, she started being nasty again. She conscionable wanted to regenerate MIL
and commencement meddling/dictating presumption successful our life. I chopped contacts. She had a large statement with my hubby past year. spewing venom - jealous rage implicit our house, our careers, etc. He chopped contacts with her. She is present pressurising my hubby via FIL to talk to her again. She simply cannot header with deficiency of power and is hopeless for “information” astir our beingness truthful she tin compare.
I realise MIL and SIL are nasty people. They prosecute with the satellite connected these terms, truthful they don’t happening they are not being nasty. Typical narcissistic property traits, they cannot respect boundaries. Also, they messiness with others lives and instrumentality large pleasance successful sabotaging things for radical truthful that their lives consciousness amended successful comparison.
sorry for the agelong ramble. I don’t cognize what to do.
My main problems are;
1. Unable to enslaved with husband. He is 100/100 close now. I’m incapable to hide the past. I conscionable don’t spot him (to beryllium 100% connected my side), I truly cannot marque myself susceptible to different large fto down.
2. SIL is hopeless to messiness with our beingness again. I americium tired. If my hubby decides to talk to her again, should I divorcement him? I conscionable don’t person the clip and vigor for caput games and **** amusement again. She volition invited this arsenic she volition astir apt manipulate him to springiness her money/gifts. I don’t attraction anymore. I’m luckily to person a occupation and I tin look aft myself and my children connected my own.
